Off to Dream… My god! What is that unholy racket?

07:36 AM

This morning, the following Twitter thread resonated with me.

The trauma response “flight” can show up as keeping yourself constantly busy, not giving yourself spaciousness to feel and be.

Rest is healing. Constantly striving, self-optimizing, and working may actually be fight-or-flight. This inevitably leads to repeated cycles of burnout.

— Sam Dylan Finch (@samdylanfinch) December 28, 2020

I look at the piles of projects around me and wonder how much of the above thread applies to me. Am I allowing myself enough time for self- reflection. Am I just stacking up projects to keep myself from dealing with the trauma. Is all the additional effort improving my professional skills really about improving my work life or am I just chasing vapors to keep myself from really accepting the current status?

Am I taking enough rest to let the answers to the questions bubble up? This will need to wait. I fuck all for sleep last night because I stayed up late working on this site.

09:11 PM

Gonna try to hit the ay earlier tonight. Six hours sleep that was interrupted repeatedly by Diane patting or poking me. Something about me snoring or some such nonsense. Like I snore.

Okay, I do. It was was self-defense on her part. Getting to bed earlier means I will snore less or at least quieter.